The Rammifications of Thought


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Friday, June 30, 2006

Young and Dangerous: The teenage female version

What, haven't you read the papers these days? It seems like a bunch of whackos in school uniforms ganged up against a girl, allegedly students of St Joseph's school in Miri.

I have to confess, I haven't seen a girl throw a punch before. Slaps, maybe. But look at the 'main actresses' in that infamous video, they're practically throwing their limbs around the victim. Man, it gives me the shivers looking at adolescent girls beating up someone like that. Sort of like a teenage, female version of the HK movie "Young and Dangerous".

I wouldn't blame them if they had hormone imbalance or were under tremendous amount of pressure. But 14 year-olds? I bet they're having the time of their life, and the hormones are supposed to be acting in a good way, if you get what I mean.

Those violent little biatches deserve to be whacked 1000 times the way they beat up the other girl. After that only send them to juvenile prison or whatever. Then it's their parents turn to bear the brunt. Gangster or no ganster, they should be held responsible for those actions.

Oh and to the guys in the video, you people should just stop acting like pussies and get real. Merely repeating the words "Gou liao, gou liao" (Enough, enough) ain't gonna get you anywhere.

Rojaks posted this video on his website so if you haven't had your weekly dose of violence-laden movies, you don't need me to tell you where you can get it. Or do you? Click!

For more juicy information please visit ChengSim's blog. I dunno where she got all those rumours from but hey, what's the harm of adding more consipiracy to one that's already attracted the nation's attention?

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Thursday, June 29, 2006

The arrow that pierces the heart

The first and only time we met, it was at a crowded place. I can't help but think of the song by James Blunt. You were immersed in conversation, caught in the laughter of all the other people around you. Emotions of joy were portrayed on everyone's faces.

But you stood out among them. At least, you did in my mind. Was it your flowing exuberance that seem to come so naturally from inside? Or was it your fine features carved on porcelain skin that attracted my attention? Or your angelic voice that seemed to act as as magnet to all around you. Maybe it was all of those, even more.

When you sang, you lifted my spirits. Although I never knew the lyrics, my soul was bewitched by your melodious voice. I stumbled to sing along, although the sound resonating from my throat was far too mediocre in comparison. After all, how was the voice of a mortal to be compared to one that came from the heavens itself?

When you spoke, everyone listened. You told of how you overcame your pride, and how you found a new light in this hectic, cruel world. I was listening too, though you might not have noticed it.

Yes, I did listen, and I was moved.

But why? Why did you seem so cold after all that had been said and done? Why did you not notice I, who was so foolish charmed by your personality?

You barely said a word. And that word could've meant the world to me. To the world, you might be one person. But to one person, you are the world. Why did you not spare me the sorrow of knowing that, people are not always who they seem to be? To crush a man's hopes means to crush him entirely. Never have I came so close to experiencing the emotions concealed in those words.

As I listen to this familiar tune, my heart sinks and my soul despairs.

"But it's time to face the truth...I will never be with you."

Author's personal note: This post was entirely fictional. Any similarities to those living in real world are merely coincidences. I tried to base it on Kyels style of writing so thanks to her for the inspiration.


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First evar paycheck

It's been nearly one month since I've started working.

And it's end of the month now.

Which means...

I got my first paycheck.

$$$$$

Woot!

It's not much, after deducting the EPF, Socso etc.

But I'm a happy guy :D

Now let's see how long it'll last me.


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Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Superman's got a new nemesis

Move aside, Lex Luthor. Superman has a new villain to stretch his sexy red underwear with.

Introducing...

CLEANROOM MAN!!!

Name: Cleanroom Man

Also know as: The Clean Freak

Favourite tagline: With great cleanliness comes great responsibility...to eradicate dirtbags!

Special powers: Vacuum Punch (ability to suck up an entire garbage dump and pulverize the enemy in one blow), Detergent Torch (ability to spew insane amounts of cleaning solution from the nostrils and mouth to imobilize the enemy), The Scrub (ability to reduce the enemy to shiny bones using The Sponge)

Known weaknesses: Unable to tolerate bad personal hygiene, low resistance towards Cocka-roach, a bug found on the planet Cockaton, goes weak in the knees for sexy gorgeous (and clean) women

Sidekick(s): The Bunnysuit Hooligans

It'll be the Showdown of The Year!!


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Monday, June 26, 2006

Classroom days are over...period

I passed my Six Sigma test...woot!

For the past week I've been attending classes organized by the company so they can waste less, earn more and conquer the civilized world...well at least the part that uses electronics. And it sure made me feel like I was back in my varsity days.

I'd sit somewhere near the back of the classroom, suppressing the urge to fall asleep while the instructor would keep going on and on about quality issues, failure analysis, comparison methods etc. The only thing different was this time each of us had a PC for our own use, supposedly for the purpose of getting familiar with the statistical software, but also, I observed, for our own personal use.

It's interesting, really. If I had any idea of how to use those techniques and apply them in my job scope, which I have none for the time being. I guess it's not a good idea to sign up for courses when you're barely 2 weeks into the job. But then it's a learning curve I have to adapt to...lots of new knowledge and skills to learn and get used to.

Anyway, it feels good to pass the test. The restless nights of studies, the stressful process of sitting for the test, the nervous waiting period, and the adrenalin rush when you know that you passed...to be truthful I DID NOT experience that, but still, it feels good.

No celebration for this one though. Now the work's gonna start. For real.


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Sunday, June 25, 2006

I got smacked!

I was checking on my blog's sitemeter the other day when I noticed a sudden surge of visitors. Clicking on the referrals link, I saw this...

See that most of the incoming links are from http://italk2much.com? Then it hit me that my blog had been reviewed by one of the "bitches" there.

I don't know whether to feel lucky or not, really. Lucky because the reviewer, Charles (italk2much's newest member, aka "Asian Blog Consultant") gave me 2 smacks. Unlucky because I was too intoxicated to submit my blog for a review, knowing well that I'd be blasted right to Pluto or some other obscure planet.

The bitchings were mainly about how my blog title was spelt. I know Americans think they're the kings of the world, but hey, I'd like to stick to British English thank you very much. So shoot me if I have two M's in raMMifications. Long live the Queen!

Also discussed was my post about Chili's. FYI if you're a noob at currencies, people here in Malaysia don't earn in USD so that means 95 RINGGIT MALAYSIA. Thanks to Suanie for pointers on the exchange rate.

Want to know how I got smacked? Read it here.

Don't have any idea on smacks? Click on the button below to submit your blog for a loving review.

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Friday, June 23, 2006

Dinner at Chili's

I've wanted to check out Chili's Grill and Bar for some time now but was completely devoid of an occasion and also a companion to dine there.

But then it was a special day and Gurl was around to attend the "LeeHom concert" so we hopped over to the branch in 1Utama after I finished work.

Chili's is sort of like Friday's, an American styled restaurant and serving American cuisine. Everything practically shouts WE LOVE USA here, even the background music was western-themed.

One thing I liked about the place was the tables...they were tiled!





We shared the ribeye steak for the main dish as she already had a nibble before that. And a wise decision it turned out to be, as we were nearly stuffed at the end of the meal. We had the steak medium done, and it was delicious! I wouldn't have it any other way.

Also included in our meal was the soup of the day (mushroom chicken) and also the house salad. The chunky pieces of meat in the soup made it well worth the price.

The bill came to about 95 bucks, including our drinks. A bit too pricey for me but when the occasion calls, I wouldn't miss this place.

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Thursday, June 22, 2006

Mind your manners...please

According to a survey conducted by RD, KL was given the honour of being ranked…(drumroll please)…the THIRD rudest city among 35 other major cities all over the world.

I'm not being the unpatriotic one here, but it looks like Malaysians still have a long way to go when it comes to courtesy. Take for example this typical conversation that's a common occurence at one of the country's largest supermarket chains.

Cashier: "........*press press press*"

Customer: "Err excuse me but where can I claim the free gift for my purchase?"

Cashier: "........Fifty four ringgit thirty cents."

Customer: "Oh...ok. Here it is."

Cashier: "........*looks like a family member just died*"

Customer: "Wtf's wrong with you? Have I offended you somehow? Don't you cashiers have any manners?"

Cashier: "........*looks like the whole family just died*"

That's why I'm totally against shopping in The Store unless there aren't any alternatives available, and when I need to know I do not have the worst job in the world. Just a glimpse at those liveless faces is sufficient for me to feel thankful.

Another recent rude experience that I had was at PJS 1 yesterday when we dropped by a mamak restaurant to have dinner. After waiting for ages for our roti naan to come, I went over to the kitchen to ask about our order, and was greeted with this.

"Sini punya boss ada masa sendiri, tak sama dengan boss sana (restaurant owner). Kalau you nak cepat makan roti canai lah."

(In english it would be roughly translated as "Bug off")

Diu. This type of people should be condemned to the hells of the kitchen and never have the opportunity to face another customer ever. Same goes for every customer service representative that cannot comprehend the simple gesture of BEING NICE to the customer. What's the point of being in customer service when you don't know how to smile?

No wonder there's the radio ads teaching us how to be courteous. Even the DPM had to stand up and say something to save us from snobbishdom.

Where's the usual "friendly" and "warm" personality that has been give widespread publicity in recent travel campaigns? Where are the lovely faces we see on those Cuti-Cuti Malaysia ads? Where are the manners, people??


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Wednesday, June 21, 2006

LeeHom in action

I was in Bukit Jalil last Sunday to watch LeeHom 'in concert'.



Why is his english name LeeHom when his chinese name is Wang Li Hong? What happened to the surname?



"Eat your hearts out, pretty boys. I'm the prettiest."

Taiwanese guy with an American accent singing a fusion of oriental pop and western hip hop. Confused?

Acknowledging the young girls who were screaming their hearts out. Teenage idolism sigh...

I'm not a big fan of chinese pop music but I must say this guy is quite talented. And I paid just 40 bucks to be less than 20 feet away from the main stage ;)

Were you there too?

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Someone was born today

Pop quiz: What do the pictures below have in common with me?


Let's make this a little bit easier. So, multiple choice answer.

a) Those are basketball jerseys and I play basketball...or

b) Those are basketball jerseys' of great players and I'm a great player...or

c) I don't play basketball but I have replicas of the jerseys?

.

.

.

The answer is...NONE OF THE ABOVE!

Like the jerseys, I'm 23. Today's the official date, but hey I wouldn't mind if you're going to treat me like today for the rest of the year.

So go on and say something nice to me and make my day.

:)


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Monday, June 19, 2006

Student life vs working life

I fetched a friend back to KL the other day. We haven't met up for quite some time now so we chatted while I braved the long and winding Karak Highway. It's not so winding to me but I dunno about you noob drivers...have you ever tried going at a constant 90, even at the bends? Now that's a challenge.

Anyway we were talking about working life and stuff, and it seems that most people we know are currently slaves to the working world. Luckily this friend of mine was just doing her industrial training, though she did experience similar pains of other employees. How I envy her for having one final year to go at university. Student life...ah those wonderful days of youth and indulgence.

It's always like that you know.

When you're studying and having shitloads of pressure during exam period, your mind always conjures up magnificent images of you sitting at the office with a cup of coffee and getting paid at the end of the month. You can't wait to graduate, and you can't wait to get your first paycheck. You're dying to get away from all the academic related stress and problems, wanting to be in the real world.

Then reality strikes and you DO graduate. Worse still, you get a job. And so hell begins.

You brave the inevitable jam to get to your office, having the same shitloads of pressure during critical project periods. The coffee's still there, but then you don't quite like it cos the water tastes funny. You get your paycheck alright but you can barely feed yourself without even allocating for entertainment with that meagre sum. Now you're begging to have the day off so you can get sufficient rest for once and hang out with friends.

Here's the REAL WORLD for you.

But that's just a hypothetical analysis, since I'm a newbie at work and work is hardly what I'm doing now.

Bah. The grass is always greener on the other side.

What do you think?


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Saturday, June 17, 2006

To all the dads out there

You are the best and we love you!

Happy Father's Day!

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Friday, June 16, 2006

Going home

I just finished training while STANDING for more than 3 hours straight. And in work shoes no less. My legs feel as though they're gonna give away anytime now. Swear I'm gonna bring my Nikes back here next week.

Didn't really pay attention anyway. All I could think of was what I'm going to do before the trip back home. Pack some dirty clothes, stop by at Giant, grab a bite, buy a cake (it's father's day!), hop on to the Federal and it's home sweet home.

I miss home already although it's barely 1 and a half hours away.

Have a good weekend people!!!

PS: Did anyone realize that I've not been posting any pictures lately? Reason is because my camera was with my parents for their Sabah trip. Hope I'll get it back this time. Or else I'll have to get myself a camera phone very soon!


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Thursday, June 15, 2006

Security guard and the rage

I was walking to the car park this morning when I noticed that the carpark security guard (if there is such a post) was sitting awkwardly in that little claustrophobic cube of his.

A closer look and I noticed that he was actually sleeping on the job. Usually I would just take this as a perfectly natural, universal phenomenon and cease at thinking about it the moment I walked past. But things did get a bit interesting today.

Since I parked at the visitor's parking, I was required to hand in my driver's license for 'safekeeping' at the guardhouse. This in exchange for a carpark pass allowing me to park my car there and thus be shielded from the possibility of being stolen or broken into. On my way out, it was supposed to be the other way around.

So I drove my car up to the entrance/exit where the guardhouse was located, expecting the guard to get out and unblock the exit for me by lifting up the makeshift barrier. But not only did he failed to notice there was someone there (probably due to my car exhaust not being loud enough), the guy wasn't even slightly aroused from his slumber.

Not wanting to waste my time waiting, I came out of the car and walked up to him.

Me: "Hello, bang. Nak ambil lesen lah." (In a not-too-loud, polite manner)

Guard: "Zzzzzz....."

Me: "HELLO! Nak ambil lesen wei!" (Starting to sound like a crazed maniac)

Guard: "Zzzzzz....*mumble mumble with saliva dripping out*"

Me: "WTF HELLO TIME TO WAKE UP BROTHER I WANNA GET OUT NOW!!!!" (Totally pissed)

Guard: "Uh....uh........."

In a drunken stupor, he proceeded to collect my carpark pass with his eyes barely open. Then he went back to sleep, without remembering that HE'S SUPPOSED TO GIVE MY LICENSE BACK. Only after some screaming, stomping and a kung-fu kick to his chin persistant nudges did I manage to knock the sense into him.

Finally I got my license and got back into the car. Suppressing the urge to swear, I thought urban mentality must have seeped into my mind barely 2 weeks after starting work. But then, these people really should stop being high all night and sleep through the day. Untidy mop of shoulder-length hair, the look of being stoned 3 days in a row, sleeping on the job....all the classic signs of an addict. And there he was, looking after our drivers licenses. Can you imagine the hassle if he happens to lose mine while dozing off?

Does he deserves to be whacked, or do I need anger management classes?

Added: Yes that's about the most interesting thing that happened that day. I seriously need a life.


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Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Under attack

I'm sick. Feeling unwell...

Been quite some time since I've felt this way. I dunno if it's over exposure to the air conditioning (my office is damn cold ok) or the pollutants in the city air. Or maybe it's the extreme stress (or lack of it) that's affecting my mental state, thus resulting in a breakdown of my by-far-reliable immune system.

My nose is running like the Niagara falls, I'm sneezing my internals out and I think I can see the little virus strands digging into everyone one of my healthy cells, pulverizing its defence. Damn I'm starting to hallucinate.

Desparately need a break right now. I'll attempt to sleep it off, see how it goes.

Goodnight people.


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Monday, June 12, 2006

What's this with football?

It puzzles me why everyone automatically assumes that all guys are crazy about football. It's like, men loving football is as natural as women giving birth to babies.

The reason I'm saying this is because I'm not particularly a big fan of football. I don't keep track of the English Premier League, the Spanish Primera, nor the Italian Serie A, and I haven't watched one single match of the World Cup so far. For that I'll probably be chastised by the football fanatics all over the world.

But come to think about it, there are a few benefits of not being a football fan...

  • You don't need ESPN, hence you can subscribe to one package less for Astro, or you can skip satelite tv altogether. Saves money.

  • You'll receive no complaints from your gf or wife, saying that you spend too much time obsessed with the sports channel rather than her. Thus decreasing the number of single guys and promoting marital bliss.

  • You can actually go to bed before midnight and avoid looking like a Chinese national treasure the next morning. Sleeping patterns are regulated, not to mention the fact that you'll be able to escape the panda poachers.

  • You save on brain space by not having to memorize countless football trivia dating back to the 1900s. Can be put to better use, eg remembering when you last changed your underwear.

  • You give other sports a chance by becoming one of THEIR fans. Croquet, hashing, lawn bowls...whatever obscure sporting activities out there that desparately need some support. Who knows they might spark a revolution some day.

Of course there are the cons as well, and I'm not saying football is a dumb sport. It's just not my idea of fun to watch 22 people chasing a ball on the field. So I don't know who broke his leg during which game against what country, and I can't fathom why. So what.

Give me NBA action anytime babey.


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Friday, June 09, 2006

My blog got listed

I found this link on Google while performing a search with a rather narcissistic purpose of boosting my feel-good hormones. And guess what, I'm listed on Blogshares!

A quick glance at the intro page showed that Blogshares is actually "a fantasy stock market where weblogs are the companies".

Sounds simple?

"Players invest fictional dollars on shares in blogs. Blogs are valued by their incoming links and add value to other blogs by linking to them. Prices can go up or down based on trading and the underlying value of the blog. No actual ownership of blogs is transfered."

Not being very familiar with this fantasy stock market, I made my own noob conclusion that my blog is really worth something. Wanna purchase all the shares to it? Well that'll set you back $3242.76 (currency unknown, but if it were up to me that'd be in...whatever that's the most valuable currency out there...maybe British pounds?). Sure, it's nothing compared to popular blogs, but at least it's worth something.

And then I saw this.

"BlogShares is purely a fictional marketplace."

:(

There goes my inspiration of becoming a whiz-kid stock market expert.

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Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Wakey wakey

Monday: Officially woke up at 6.45am. Actually was already awake since 5 something but I thought I'd need the extra rest. Supposed to report at 8.30am, but since it was the first day, I wanted to arrive early at the office. Wanna make good impression what...

Tuesday: Awake at 6.53am after resetting the alarm. Starting to feel a bit weary about this 'up-before-7' thing...definitely could use the extra sleep. Reached office at 8, and it turned out to be half empty (or half full, depending on your view). The real activities didn't start until 9. Yawn...

Today: Dragged myself from bed at 7.00am after deciding it was no use being the early bird. The extra 7 minutes proved to be insufficient to cure my fatigue. Made it to the office at 8.10, still a bit too early. Mentor's busy today so I have the entire day to myself...dunno if it's a good thing or bad.

Tomorrow: Plan to wake up at 7.20am so I can get more rest, join the crowd and contribute to the city's traffic congestion. May be harder to find parking space by then so I hope the multi-level carpark is larger than it seems.

The Future: Get myself to a level where alarm clocks are no longer a necessity and I can spend my own sweet time in bed. Calculations based on daily time increments would put that period probably somewhere in the year 2035...so I can forget about it if I'm sticking to this job.

I now subscribe to the saying: The early bird spends more idle time in the office.

Kthxbai.


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Monday, June 05, 2006

First day at work

So today was my first day at Company X. To start with, I didn't even had a good night's sleep, thanks to some blood-sucking critters that have somehow developed the ability to fly higher and higher, probably due to mutation. Damn mosquitos.

Not wanting to be late on my first day, I woke up way early, even bordering the impossible. Actually I had no choice but to stay awake, my limbs itching with bites all over. Luckily the traffic was ok today since it was the school holidays and parents were relieved of fetching their pesky, spoilt kids to school.

There were 10 of us new hires at the company today. By the time we had our photographs taken for the badge, I had already got to know most of them. One was even a member of MyTeam, and a couple other defactors from a well-known company in Penang. Most of them were from the Klang Valley, so I reasoned that nobody would want to work here if they weren't local...with me being the exception of course.

We had our morning tea break...and in no time were brought to our respective departments. Mine was situated in a "clean area", meaning it was totally free of dust, particles, bacteria, viruses...you get the idea. Because of this special condition, we were required to wear these cute little thingies called shoe covers, somewhat resembling those covering a babies feet, except we had our shoes on. Imagine a full-grown adult in formal attire and at the same time donning red coloured mittens, and you know what I mean by cute. I assumed their purpose is to protect our shoes from getting dirty, but hey, I might be wrong.

One more thing about these mittens, I mean shoe covers, were that I couldn't get the right size. At first I didn't even know there were sizes. The first few pairs that I put on must've been meant for kids, aged 12 years and below. Practically tore the plastic covers to shreds trying to pull them on. And they made this funny plasticky sound when you walked...couldn't helped but felt that the entire office was eyeing me when I walked past. Really can't wait for the clean shoes to come.

My cubicle was located at some god-forsaken corner located near the end of the department room. I was virtually cut off from my supervisor and group members. The only benefit was that I could probably do things my boss wouldn't want me to and he'd never find out. PLUS I got a partial view of the sky, and could tell whether the Federal Highway was fucked up or not. Yes, I might be the next contributor to those traffic announcements one of these days.

"Traffic phone ranger Derek called to say that traffic is at a crawl on the Federal Highway, and based on his observations from his cubicle, he calculates that the jam will probably continue until 8.13pm, with 26 accidents happening in between..."

Yeah right.

Lunch at the cafeteria wasn't a good experience. But lucky for me and another friend, another engineer paid for our meals using the prepaid card (which is the ONLY transaction medium allowed), or we wouldn't have eaten at all. The food was rather tasteless, but was edible at the least. Some senior engineers told that it was already a big improvement from the past. I could imagine the malnourished faces of past employees wandering the corridors...SO glad I didn't graduate earlier.

To set up my workstation, I had to lug the CPU to the IT department, which was like 10 kilometres away. More like 500m but that's how you'd feel when you're walking with a ton of bricks in your lap. Another trip there to collect it nearly made my sole come off. Shoes probably don't have a long lifespan in this company, next time I might opt for hiking shoes instead. And I was just walking in ONE SINGLE BLOCK of the buildings. This place is HUGE I tell you.

Now for some technical description about my job. The group I'm in actually supports the design and development of the company's 16-bit microcontrollers, which I was told, is one of the market leaders in the automotive industry. Most car brands are likely to contain chips manufactured by the company, with the exception of Proton. Next time you plan to buy a Beamer, do have in mind that I probably had a hand in making it before you write that check.

So I spent the rest of the afternoon reading some device user guides plus some presentation slides on the product that I was assigned to, which nearly caused me to doze off in front of my supervisor. He seemed like a nice guy, but I'll reserve further comments about it until I get some real experience working under him.

Dead tired when I reached home, and yet I'm writing all this. A rather uneventful day for a newbie, but I don't have anything to complain about. REALLY. Tomorrow I'll get to park inside the building, w00t!


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Saturday, June 03, 2006

8 Things I'd Like To Do Before Starting Work

  1. Go on a trip to Egypt to visit the pyramids, immerse myself in the rich, ancient history that surrounds the magnificent structures. Also wanna have a look at King Tut...been watching too many Discovery programs lately.
  2. A tour of the places mentioned in the Da Vinci Code - Paris, London, and Scotland. Particularly looking forward to visiting the Louvre and get my chance at interpreting the quirky smile behind La Joconde. Also hoping to meet my own Princess Sophie...ahaks.
  3. Watch every single blockbuster movie ever to have been made in a super-widescreen theatre with Dolby Surround sound system, without having to endure the cinema-morons who are capable with coming up with all ways of annoying you.
  4. Go on a shopping spree in Singapore with unlimited credit. It's the great Singapore Sale! Too bad I'm not in JB...wanna get my hands on the Creative Zen that they're offering for half price (foreigners only).
  5. Meet up with every prominent blogger in the local blogosphere. Favourites include Suanie, Fireangel, Kim and the list goes on, though the possibility of setting up a meeting with them is slim. I mean, who'd wanna go out with a blogger nobody like me? :p
  6. Go Muar to spend some time with Gurl...and to savour the delicious food there. Would also like to meet up with some Muar bloggers that I've got to known over the months.
  7. Repeat all the items above for an infinite amount of times.
  8. Find some hidden treasure buried in the mountains so that I'll strike it rich and won't need to work.

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Friday, June 02, 2006

In debt

My car got a new coat of paint today.

Still maintains the old fiery red body.

And now dad says I owe him 500 bucks for the paint job.

Looks like I'm already in debt even before my first paycheck. Not that I wouldn't pay my dad back...but it leaves me pondering about my impending survival in the most expensive city in the country.

I mean, what if I need to get a new handphone, or a new ipod...or a new car?

But then again, these aren't 'needs'. Yup, I can do without them...for now.

Sigh the difficulties of life.


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Thursday, June 01, 2006

Changes to lifestyle

I've decided to come up with some "changes to lifestyle" as recommended by some prominent politicians of our beloved Bolehland due to the recent hike in toll prices, petrol, electricity tariff, chicken...hell almost everything. And here I'm sharing some ways of reducing your electricity bills, just so you happen to be in the 60% of households that are affected.

Sleep without turning on the air-conditioning. As an alternative, try using a fan. No not the wall or ceiling type because that would consume electricity too; I mean the FAN, just like the ones you saw in the Geisha movie. Additional benefits: tones the muscles in your arms. Insomniacs can probably fan themselves to sleep.

Get used to bathing in the dark with cold water. We live in a tropical country so who needs hot water when it's 35 freaking degrees outside? Instead, use unheated water and bathe ONLY during the day. And you'll probably be more pleased with yourself when you look into the mirror; natural/dim lighting does wonders for self-confidence.

Refrain from any form of ironing. Dump the iron altogether or you could substitute it with the old charcoal-powered antique type, that is if you can find one. Saves the weekly hassle of having to iron out your shirts and skirts. Additional benefits: makes your wife happier and gives you an excuse when you show up in the office with a wrinkled shirt.

Stop watching the TV. TV is EVIL. It's a good thing to turn it off if you don't want your kids to be gun-toting Arnold-wannabes when they grow up. That includes the Discovery channel. How would your child feel when they find out that they're the product of your rendezvous in bed? They don't call it the idiot box for no reason.

Introduce a Fridge-Free week to the family. On alternate weeks, clear everything in the fridge and proceed not to use it. That will ensure that the family only eats FRESH food, not some frozen blocks of meat that belonged to a poor animal butchered decades ago. Also ensures your fridge does not turn into a garbage dump. Oh, and don't forget to switch the power off.

During these times, a spartan life is a good one.

Photo from www.alisonwright.com

Remember, it is not the government's fault that the cost of living is rising. It's totally OUR fault because the last time I remembered, in democracy, THE GOVERNMENT IS THE PEOPLE! Shame on us.


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